1 | THERE’S NO SHAME IN SEEKING HELP
You shouldn’t feel less than, or weak, or like you can’t do it yourself if you seek help. There are times in our lives where we can feel the waves crashing in, and it can feel like we’re drowning. That’s what grief does, it blots out the sun and casts despair into every corner of our lives. But, it’s powerful to fight in authenticity and reach out for support. God is there to meet us in our mess and wants to bring us out of that blackness. When you’re struggling, seek out the help you need. The number one thing to remember is that God Loves You!
2 | UNHELPFUL HELP + TANGIBLE HELP
When you’re grieving, we can experience both ‘unhelpful help’ and ‘tangible help’ from those that are around us. Sometimes people just don’t understand what you’re going through because they’ve never gone through something like that or they assume that someone else will be around soon to take over the care portion of the healing.
1 // Make sure you avoid unhelpful help. Be sympathetic to those that are grieving around you. Grief can take many forms, it can occur at different times, and everyone experiences it differently. Don’t try to rush the process for anyone and don’t try to impose our timelines on them. Pray for them, pray that God would heal them and pray that God’s will be done in the situation and just BE with them. Honor Him always.
2 // Try to pursue tangible help. One of the last things people experiencing grief want to do is to make another decision. Pursue practicality for them over trying to be overtly spiritual. Can you take them out to lunch, or no? Can you bring them flowers? Sometimes it’s better just to do, as well. If you ask them to call you if they need anything, often times they won’t. Take the time to bring the initiative to them. Or you can try talking about their loved ones that are gone, often people are so afraid of the subject, we’re not able to reminisce in the joyous memories they have.
3 | DON’T KEEP THE BALL UNDER THE WATER
Grief has a way of returning, even when we think we’re past it and we’ve dealt with it fully. It could be a song, or a movie quote, or a stranger’s voice in passing, we make these connections in our memories to those that we’ve lost. And it’s ok to tell their story, it’s ok to remember them. Whenever you feel the urge to bury those feelings and your grief, don’t! Don’t stuff those away, it’s one of the most toxic things that you can do. When we try and hold that ball under water, it takes all of our energy and leaves us exhausted. Inevitably, it always finds it’s way to the surface in an outburst anyways. Don’t hold back, don’t stuff, don’t hold that ball under the water.